Restoring Connection With Life & Thriving
Healing My Son's Baseball Injury Trauma
Everyone has experienced feeling unsettled. It is part of being human. When something disturbs us, our nervous system gets activated. It is the activation that creates a sense of feeling unsettled. If the disturbance is not too activating, our nervous system naturally returns to a state of equilibrium. However, there are times for all of us, when our nervous system needs help in regulating itself. And this is especially true if someone has been traumatized, as was the case with my son, Teddy.
Teddy has been a softball turned baseball Little Leaguer since he was old enough to play. He’s also participated in our neighborhood association’s summer softball league every summer, starting with t-ball when he was three. He absolutely loved softball and then baseball, smacking ‘em into the outfield at an early age. He also wanted to pitch early on, although he was OK with playing short stop like Derek Jeter, or out-fielding like Curtis Granderson. (We’re big Yankees fans.)
In the 2008 Little League season the players themselves, as opposed to a coach or a pitching machine, became the pitchers. And at the end of the season Teddy got badly hit by the ball twice, resulting in swelling and bruises. As a result he was reluctant to sign up for baseball again. But my husband & I felt for a lot of reasons it was important for him to work this through for himself, especially given how much he had loved baseball.
For most of the 2009 Little League season he showed signs of developing a phobia around being hit by a pitched ball. He would routinely step out of the batter’s box and duck, often times even before the ball had left the pitcher’s hand. This was in spite of tremendous support and encouragement from his coaches, fellow teammates, their parents and my husband and me. As we sadly repeatedly watched this, we knew he was obviously traumatized.
Knowing this, his coaches and Dad worked with him, using a desensitization technique whereby they repeatedly threw tennis balls at him on more than one occasion. But this was to no avail. We painfully watched Teddy continuing to struggle with his fear. He asked us to buy padding for him to wear while he was up to bat, which we did. He’d faithfully strap it on, but again to no avail.
For most of the 2009 Little League season he showed signs of developing a phobia around being hit by a pitched ball. He would routinely step out of the batter’s box and duck, often times even before the ball had left the pitcher’s hand. This was in spite of tremendous support and encouragement from his coaches, fellow teammates, their parents and my husband and me. As we sadly repeatedly watched this, we knew he was obviously traumatized.
Knowing this, his coaches and Dad worked with him, using a desensitization technique whereby they repeatedly threw tennis balls at him on more than one occasion. But this was to no avail. We painfully watched Teddy continuing to struggle with his fear. He asked us to buy padding for him to wear while he was up to bat, which we did. He’d faithfully strap it on, but again to no avail.
Teammates’ parents faithfully cheered him on, game after game, yelling “you can do it, Teddy!”. But as much as he wanted to, he couldn’t. After a while his teammates would fluctuate between being supportive and increasingly expressing disappointment when he’d be struck out while unnecessarily avoiding the ball. He’d pace, like a caged animal when his team was batting. He even started to isolate himself from the team, standing on the edge, not sitting on the bench. It was almost as if he was non-verbally saying “I don’t belong with you. I don’t belong on the team.” It was heartbreaking to watch him struggling like this.
Given that I have specialized training in treating trauma, although I’d never treated a sports injury, I pondered what I was observing & figured out how I’d treat him based on my knowledge of treating a car accident survivor, wherein one is hit by another car and impact trauma occurs. Although I offered to help Teddy as soon as I had an idea as to how to treat him, he refused my help for weeks. I suspect he kept thinking “I can do this myself. This time at bat will be different.” But he couldn’t, because the trauma was locked in his body.
Given that I have specialized training in treating trauma, although I’d never treated a sports injury, I pondered what I was observing & figured out how I’d treat him based on my knowledge of treating a car accident survivor, wherein one is hit by another car and impact trauma occurs. Although I offered to help Teddy as soon as I had an idea as to how to treat him, he refused my help for weeks. I suspect he kept thinking “I can do this myself. This time at bat will be different.” But he couldn’t, because the trauma was locked in his body.
Somatic Experiencing, developed by Dr. Peter Levine, is a treatment approach to trauma based on the belief that when something traumatic happens the nervous system gets overwhelmed. At the point of overwhelm we go into a fight or flight response and if for whatever reasons neither of those options are available to us, we go into a freeze response. If the trauma was so disturbing and the nervous system got so overwhelmed, we can get stuck in a highly charged state.
When this happens behaviors emerge such as avoiding any seemingly similar stimuli. If this repeatedly occurs it’s an indication that the nervous system is overly activated, highly charged energy is stuck in the nervous system, and an intervention is needed whereby the nervous system is deactivated.
When an impact injury occurs such as in a car accident, part of the trauma is that it happens so quickly the victim gets “blind sided”. Their nervous system and brain doesn’t have enough time to take notice of all the external cues, process the warning signals and naturally respond in an effectively self-protective way. Therefore part of the treatment is going back & letting them replay the event in slow motion, so they’re given the chance to act on their own behalf in a way that is instinctually self-protective.
In my son Teddy’s case, the balls that unexpectedly hit him came at him so quickly that his brain didn’t have time to take in & process the cues that would have naturally led him to move out of the way. After yet another game of humiliatingly getting struck out, “going down looking”, as they say, Teddy finally allowed me to help him. Using the training I have, responding to Teddy in the moment & having an inspired thought at the end, I came up with the protocol included at the end.
At the point at the end of the protocol (#27), when I said “Realize it’s going to hit you, so you need to step out of the way” I saw Teddy’s reflexes click in and he very naturally stepped out of the way. But as the saying goes, “the proof is in the pudding”.
When this happens behaviors emerge such as avoiding any seemingly similar stimuli. If this repeatedly occurs it’s an indication that the nervous system is overly activated, highly charged energy is stuck in the nervous system, and an intervention is needed whereby the nervous system is deactivated.
When an impact injury occurs such as in a car accident, part of the trauma is that it happens so quickly the victim gets “blind sided”. Their nervous system and brain doesn’t have enough time to take notice of all the external cues, process the warning signals and naturally respond in an effectively self-protective way. Therefore part of the treatment is going back & letting them replay the event in slow motion, so they’re given the chance to act on their own behalf in a way that is instinctually self-protective.
In my son Teddy’s case, the balls that unexpectedly hit him came at him so quickly that his brain didn’t have time to take in & process the cues that would have naturally led him to move out of the way. After yet another game of humiliatingly getting struck out, “going down looking”, as they say, Teddy finally allowed me to help him. Using the training I have, responding to Teddy in the moment & having an inspired thought at the end, I came up with the protocol included at the end.
At the point at the end of the protocol (#27), when I said “Realize it’s going to hit you, so you need to step out of the way” I saw Teddy’s reflexes click in and he very naturally stepped out of the way. But as the saying goes, “the proof is in the pudding”.
Teddy went to his game a little while later that Sat. morning. His first time up at bat he didn’t get a hit, but he didn’t step out of the box. Improvement, in my opinion. Teddy got mad and proclaimed to my husband, “what Mommy did, didn’t help!”. But his next time up at bat he did get a hit, and he’s been appropriately avoiding or not swinging at certain balls, or hitting the hittable balls ever since!
Although he wore his protective padding during the first game in which he hit the ball, at the next game he voluntarily proclaimed he wasn't going to wear it. And he didn't. I feel a lot of appreciation for Nancy J. Napier and Diane Poole Heller, my two "Somatic Experiencing" teachers. Without the SE reference point I wouldn't have been able to figure this out.
The smile on Teddy's face and the relief in his body, as well as him thanking me and giving me a big hug after this first hit of the season game, was the best. I wrote an article several years ago on treating trauma and the subtitle was “setting the captive free”. To have been able to do this for my own son was a truly awesome experience. I’m glad he finally allowed me to help him restore his connection with himself, his teammates and baseball. And his smile, renewed confidence, “thanks, Mom” and big hug conveyed to me he is too.
Although he wore his protective padding during the first game in which he hit the ball, at the next game he voluntarily proclaimed he wasn't going to wear it. And he didn't. I feel a lot of appreciation for Nancy J. Napier and Diane Poole Heller, my two "Somatic Experiencing" teachers. Without the SE reference point I wouldn't have been able to figure this out.
The smile on Teddy's face and the relief in his body, as well as him thanking me and giving me a big hug after this first hit of the season game, was the best. I wrote an article several years ago on treating trauma and the subtitle was “setting the captive free”. To have been able to do this for my own son was a truly awesome experience. I’m glad he finally allowed me to help him restore his connection with himself, his teammates and baseball. And his smile, renewed confidence, “thanks, Mom” and big hug conveyed to me he is too.
Protocol For Treating A Baseball Injury Trauma
1) Explain to the traumatized batter that part of his/her problem is he/she didn’t have enough time to see the ball coming towards him, figure out that he was going to be hit, and move out of the way. So we’re going to replay it together now, in slow motion, in order to give his body the chance to do what he wasn’t able to do when he got hit.
2) Have the batter stand w/ a bat in his hands as if he’s going to be pitched to and hit the ball.
3) You stand a distance from him as if you’re going to pitch the ball.
4) Then you say to him : “You can keep your eyes open or close them if you like as I talk you through imagining this happening differently, where you have enough time to see the ball coming towards you and step out of the way. OK, here we go ....
5)Imagine that I’m winding up to pitch the ball. In your imagination see me winding up ... I’m winding up .... I’m winding up... I’m winding up .....
6)Now I’m throwing the ball.... See me throwing the ball ....I’m throwing the ball ....I’m throwing the ball ....
7)Now see the ball coming towards you in slow motion, slowly ...slowly... see the ball coming towards you ...
8)Now see the ball coming towards you in slow motion, slowly ...slowly... see the ball coming towards you ...
9)Realize that it’s going to hit you, so you need to step out of the way, in slow motion, slowly realize it’s going to hit you and you need to step out of the way ... slowly, slowly realize it’s going to hit you and you need to step out of the way ....
10)Allow yourself, slowly, slowly, to step out of the way and miss the ball. In slow motion, you slowly, slowly allow yourself to step out of the way and miss the ball.”
11)REPEAT THIS SEQUENCE (#s 5 - 10) 2 MORE TIMES.
2) Have the batter stand w/ a bat in his hands as if he’s going to be pitched to and hit the ball.
3) You stand a distance from him as if you’re going to pitch the ball.
4) Then you say to him : “You can keep your eyes open or close them if you like as I talk you through imagining this happening differently, where you have enough time to see the ball coming towards you and step out of the way. OK, here we go ....
5)Imagine that I’m winding up to pitch the ball. In your imagination see me winding up ... I’m winding up .... I’m winding up... I’m winding up .....
6)Now I’m throwing the ball.... See me throwing the ball ....I’m throwing the ball ....I’m throwing the ball ....
7)Now see the ball coming towards you in slow motion, slowly ...slowly... see the ball coming towards you ...
8)Now see the ball coming towards you in slow motion, slowly ...slowly... see the ball coming towards you ...
9)Realize that it’s going to hit you, so you need to step out of the way, in slow motion, slowly realize it’s going to hit you and you need to step out of the way ... slowly, slowly realize it’s going to hit you and you need to step out of the way ....
10)Allow yourself, slowly, slowly, to step out of the way and miss the ball. In slow motion, you slowly, slowly allow yourself to step out of the way and miss the ball.”
11)REPEAT THIS SEQUENCE (#s 5 - 10) 2 MORE TIMES.
12) “OK, good. Now we’re going to practice hitting the ball in slow motion, even a home run if you like.
13) Imagine that I’m winding up to pitch the ball. In your imagination see me winding up ... I’m winding up .... I’m winding up... I’m winding up .....
14) Now I’m throwing the ball.... See me throwing the ball ....I’m throwing the ball.
15) Now see the ball coming towards you in slow motion, slowly ...slowly... see the ball coming towards you ...
16) Now see the ball heading towards the middle of home plate in slow motion, slowly ...slowly... see the ball heading towards the middle of home plate ...
17) Realize it’s going to be a strike, so you need to get ready to hit the ball, in slow motion, slowly realize it’s going to be a strike and you need to get ready to hit the ball ... slowly, slowly realize it’s going to be a strike and you need to get ready to hit the ball ....
18) Allow yourself, slowly, slowly, to hit the ball. In slow motion, you slowly, slowly allow yourself to hit the ball.
19) Slowly watch it become a home run. Watch it slowly become a home run.
20) Imagine yourself running the bases, all the way around to home plate. Take your time, imagining yourself running all the bases, and arriving at home base. Notice what that feels like in your body.”
21) REPEAT THIS SEQUENCE (#s 12 - 18) 1 MORE TIME.
22) Now without telling him, you’re going to do a change-up like this: He will be expecting you to take him through the sequence of hitting the ball one more time. Instead, you will repeat the first sequence.
23)”Imagine that I’m winding up to pitch the ball. In your imagination see me winding up ... I’m winding up .... I’m winding up... I’m winding up .....
24)Now I’m throwing the ball.... See me throwing the ball ....I’m throwing the ball ....I’m throwing the ball ....
25)Now see the ball coming towards you in slow motion, slowly ...slowly... see the ball coming towards you ...
26)Now see the ball coming towards you in slow motion, slowly ...slowly... see the ball coming towards you ...
27)Realize that it’s going to hit you, so you need to step out of the way, in slow motion, slowly realize it’s going to hit you and you need to step out of the way ... slowly, slowly realize it’s going to hit you and you need to step out of the way ....
28)Allow yourself, slowly, slowly, to step out of the way and miss the ball. In slow motion, you slowly, slowly allow yourself to step out of the way and miss the ball.”
By now you should have seen the batter's natural reflexes kick in. If not, repeat the protocol.
Written June, 2009
13) Imagine that I’m winding up to pitch the ball. In your imagination see me winding up ... I’m winding up .... I’m winding up... I’m winding up .....
14) Now I’m throwing the ball.... See me throwing the ball ....I’m throwing the ball.
15) Now see the ball coming towards you in slow motion, slowly ...slowly... see the ball coming towards you ...
16) Now see the ball heading towards the middle of home plate in slow motion, slowly ...slowly... see the ball heading towards the middle of home plate ...
17) Realize it’s going to be a strike, so you need to get ready to hit the ball, in slow motion, slowly realize it’s going to be a strike and you need to get ready to hit the ball ... slowly, slowly realize it’s going to be a strike and you need to get ready to hit the ball ....
18) Allow yourself, slowly, slowly, to hit the ball. In slow motion, you slowly, slowly allow yourself to hit the ball.
19) Slowly watch it become a home run. Watch it slowly become a home run.
20) Imagine yourself running the bases, all the way around to home plate. Take your time, imagining yourself running all the bases, and arriving at home base. Notice what that feels like in your body.”
21) REPEAT THIS SEQUENCE (#s 12 - 18) 1 MORE TIME.
22) Now without telling him, you’re going to do a change-up like this: He will be expecting you to take him through the sequence of hitting the ball one more time. Instead, you will repeat the first sequence.
23)”Imagine that I’m winding up to pitch the ball. In your imagination see me winding up ... I’m winding up .... I’m winding up... I’m winding up .....
24)Now I’m throwing the ball.... See me throwing the ball ....I’m throwing the ball ....I’m throwing the ball ....
25)Now see the ball coming towards you in slow motion, slowly ...slowly... see the ball coming towards you ...
26)Now see the ball coming towards you in slow motion, slowly ...slowly... see the ball coming towards you ...
27)Realize that it’s going to hit you, so you need to step out of the way, in slow motion, slowly realize it’s going to hit you and you need to step out of the way ... slowly, slowly realize it’s going to hit you and you need to step out of the way ....
28)Allow yourself, slowly, slowly, to step out of the way and miss the ball. In slow motion, you slowly, slowly allow yourself to step out of the way and miss the ball.”
By now you should have seen the batter's natural reflexes kick in. If not, repeat the protocol.
Written June, 2009